2500 Jokes to Start 'Em Laughing by Robert Orben

By Robert Orben

There isn't any greater, quicker, or more desirable strategy to achieve out and seize an audience's cognizance than the adroit use of humor. An apt, well-timed shaggy dog story can soothe the antagonistic, concentration the bored stiff, and the spur at the enthusiastic.

In this most recent assortment from Robert Orben, grasp of the one-liner and fountain of humor for the good television and stand-up comics, are accumulated over 2500 brief, suitable, and sharp laugh-getters that may simply be additional to speeches, lectures, displays, or informal dialog. prepared into numerous hundred different types for ease in choice, the subject material is topical--ranging from acupuncture and pollution to women's liberation and X-rated video clips. many of the jokes are one-liners that flow with a snap and a sizzle that anecdotes and long tales lack.

Here you can find openings and closings for speeches, plus random and particular remark beneficial to someone who has ever been referred to as upon to "say a number of words." a fabulous software for audio system, writers, and performers, Mr. Orben's most up-to-date ebook also will offer hours of laugh-filled analyzing for everyone.

Note from the uploader: those jokes are usually not humorous.

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Example text

AMBROSE They were lousy customers! MUSIC Traditional Celtic music. AMBROSE slips into a tartan vest and moves to confront an unseen customer. AMBROSE You are behaving like a supercilious harpy. If you want my attention – ask for it: whistles and snapping fingers will get you nowhere. Really – 49 if you think you’re flirting you’re failing. Just because I work for slave wages doesn’t make me your slave. Now what do you want? I’ve been to this table three times already and you still seem incapable of making up your mind.

FREDDY Ambrose – I’m basically a shy guy. You know that. It’s tough for us shy guys to get laid because we’re too busy being – shy. So drop it. AMBROSE Still not getting anywhere with Estelle? FREDDY Do you ever listen? I’m not tryin to get anywhere with Estelle. We’re just friends. We hang out. AMBROSE Whatever you say. FREDDY Will another beer change the subject? 39 AMBROSE downs his beer. AMBROSE Absolutely. FREDDY goes for beer. AMBROSE sighs. He muses. He gets an idea. He produces pen and paper.

I’m just a working stiff with a brain and not much patience. Please – would you mind very much not sucking the life out of me?

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